Barbecue & Longhorns

Don't know if I have talked about it before, but J-BAR-H has a special relationship with Diana Tatum of TXlonghornForHire.com. I can't even remember how we met now, but I have to say that her passion for longhorns rivals my own passion for feeding people. We hit it off so well, that Diana also represents J-BAR-H Texas Catering to the Houston marketplace.

Our relationship is a complementary one, if not confusing for the longhorns. My pit-trailer has a bumper sticker that says "This is where the food chain ends" and I am getting one made for hers that says, "Save a longhorn, eat a vegetarian." So while the longhorns feel completely safe around me, they always have it in the back of their heads that one wrong move on their part and they move from her trailer, to mine...

So is that a conflict? We ARE a caterer specializing in Texas BBQ. And everyone knows that Texas barbecue is brisket, and, well, brisket comes from animals that look strangely similar to my partner's show cows. I prefer to think we are the before and after. You can ride and have your picture taken with Gateway, Hotshot or Haywire, and then walk over and enjoy one of their exquisitely prepared cousins.

Why is barbecue so popular and why do we do it? Barbecue is popular because it has cultural significance. It is Texas comfort food and it is well defined. You don't get a lot of points for going off the ranch and getting creative. A good brisket is a definable commodity. Look for a nice, flavorful bark on the outside, a beautiful smoke ring on the inside, and a fork-tender texture with just the right amount of smoke flavor. Takes about a weekend to learn how to do it, and a lifetime to master it.

Why do we do it? Frankly, because we are so damn good at it!

I enjoy barbecue also because it doesn't just describe the food we eat, but how we cook it and the event we enjoy it at. Friends and family coming together to celebrate a wedding, companies showing how much they appreciate their employees and churches inspiring fellowship among their congregations. Everyone has a good time at a barbecue and J-BAR-H Texas Catering is honored to be the vendor of choice in our area.

So I guess whether or not you like your barbecue on the hoof, or on the plate, we have got you covered. (Haywire is my favorite...)

NEVER PICK A FIGHT WITH A JEW ABOUT BRISKET

I think it is a reasonable statement to make that Texas is known for brisket. Brisket IS Texas barbecue and no one does it like Texans, right? Right. (As a shameless plug, it is a natural extension to say that no one does Texas Brisket like J-BAR-H Texas Catering, and certainly none better.)

BUT, and this is a HUGE but, don't make the mistake of saying that Texans make THE BEST brisket, especially if there is a Jew within earshot! I made this assertion on a national catering forum and let me tell you...the retribution was swift, harsh and unrelenting. I was dog-piled by a number of good natured people informing me that the Jews were making brisket thousands of years before Texans even learned to speak English. GENERATIONS of people were thrown at me to make this point, and like the true cowboy I am, I stuck to my guns...for a time. But like the great cowboy poet once said, you've got to know when to hold 'em and know when to fold 'em.

So, this week, out of respect for the East Coast Mavens, I will be experimenting with Jewish Brisket. If for no other reason than to make an informed decision. Regardless of the outcome, the results will not be posted here NOR will they ever be discussed outside of private conversations with my castigators. (Where is Kinky Freidman when I need him?) I do have my pride, even if it is a tattered remnant of what it once was, I wear it like a sarape, a banner of past battles won and lost, slung across my shoulders as I ride into the Texas sunset...